View Full Version : 'Beards for 'Bron'

06-01-2010, 10:01 PM
Sigh, for those who can grow beards.... (Is July 1 here yet).



'Beards for 'Bron' is an astute and hirsute free agency ploy
By Trey Kerby

As you may have heard, LeBron James(notes) has options this offseason. And if you haven't heard, this guy will help you out. And if you don't care about all the particulars, you certainly know that King James will be a free agent this summer. We've only been talking about it for three years.

Furthermore, you know that fans are doing anything they can think of to entice James to play for their team. Songs and websites and customized cars are just the start. Now, WKNR, an ESPN radio station in Cleveland, has launched "Beards for 'Bron," the latest and greatest in hilarious recruiting tools. You can probably figure out what's going on by the name, but if not, here's the description offered on its throwback website:

Start growing your beard & participate in Beards for 'Bron! On June 1, 2010 you can show your support along with the ESPN Cleveland staff in growing out your beard as a message of solidarity to show our support for Cleveland in general, and our sports teams in particular!

There ya go. Cleveland is growing beards for LeBron James because he likes beards, I guess. He's sported a full playoff beard in the past, not to mention his ever-changing assortment of mustaches, line-beards and chin-straps, so it's easy to see why he'd want to stay in Cleveland if everyone had a beard. You too, ladies.

Of course, if LeBron does end up staying in Cleveland, let's hope that WKNR adds LeBron's beard to its illustrious gallery of famous beards in history. Surely LeBron would love to see himself alongside the likes of Jesus Christ, Santa Claus and David Spade.

06-01-2010, 10:16 PM
Bushes for Bron???

Mike Manifesto
06-01-2010, 10:19 PM
This is more stupid than the "LeBron Song".

06-01-2010, 10:21 PM
What's the point of me growing one? Or anyone else on this forum. LeBron won't see any of us. Unless he wants Nachos from Max, which is an exception..

06-01-2010, 10:24 PM

Gilbert's Swagg
06-01-2010, 10:27 PM
Our own radio stations are using Lebron to garner attention:thumbdown

06-01-2010, 10:40 PM
Just purchased 100 stocks " Just For Men" anybody else in?

Lord Mar
06-01-2010, 10:41 PM
I got a boner for 'bron.

06-01-2010, 10:52 PM
Our own radio stations are using Lebron to garner attention:thumbdown

Come on man... For real, it's just something they think is fun to do while we all wait on LeBron...

Lighten up Francis.......

06-01-2010, 10:55 PM
I'm just gonna fast until we know whats up

Gordon Bombay
06-01-2010, 11:03 PM
you know what would really get lebron's attention? car-pooling it up to toronto and forcing colangelo to trade bosh to cleveland...while all collectively growing beards

06-01-2010, 11:16 PM
Sorry, but I believe in taking care of myself. After my herb-mind facial mask(which I leave on for 10 minutes) shaving exfoliates my skin and keeps it smooth and taut.

Cleveland already has a bad economic reputation right now, a bunch of freshly-bearded men walking around in the summer isn't going to help. Oh yeah, there's also the part where Lebron could not care less about your facial hair.

06-01-2010, 11:23 PM
Hopefully the thousands of dollars I've thrown at the Cavs over the last 7 seasons will go further towards illustrating my love for LeBron & the Cavs than my ability to grow facial hair would.

The real problem exemplified by pathetic stunts like this is how far all forms of media have fallen and how deep they are digging for listeners/readers/viewers. Instead of journalistic integrity and actual news we are inundated by ridiculous contests, LeBron-o-Meters, and daily rumor-mongering in places like Starting Blocks, RealGM, ESPN, etc. Wake me up when it's July 1st. This is a lingering nightmare.

Is it True
06-01-2010, 11:24 PM
Lets all grow chin straps!!

06-01-2010, 11:27 PM
I guess that banner just wasn't enough. Or a crying Ohio. Or an embarrassing, yet hilarious song from Cleveland notables. Nope, what will REALLY get LeBron to stay is growing beards.

06-01-2010, 11:29 PM
Just purchased 100 stocks " Just For Men" anybody else in?

Sold my 100 stocks in Gillette.

06-01-2010, 11:29 PM
RCF should start the Shave our legs for LeBron motion!

06-01-2010, 11:36 PM
Where is Drew Gooden when we need him?


06-02-2010, 12:06 AM
I'm growing out my beard but not for Lebron, but because I'm too lazy to shave and too cheap to get a haircut (right now)

06-02-2010, 02:35 AM
Any excuse to grow a beard is good enough for me.

I shaved off the playoff beard after Game 6 and I've a few days into the new one.

If LeBron stays I may never shave again.