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Shiver me Timbers! Rumors with a Side Order of Ooompph... Breathe it In!

Do Not Sell My Personal Information
i enjoy being old enough to get most of those lines, makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside
 
I don't get the hype.
 
Yet another example of how you don't fit in on these boards.

so I am supposed to not only understand jibberish but follow it blindly? No thanks, I am not a sheep.
 
Hmmm. I'm a professional writer. I'm not sure about the whole jibberish jive.

I'm trying to find my post asking people to follow me blindly.

I apologize that your parents follow me on Twitter
 
so I am supposed to not only understand jibberish but follow it blindly? No thanks, I am not a sheep.


If you don't understand it then you need to open your eyes.
 
I understand it, he comes in here and makes a thread about what is going on with the cavs and everyone thanks him for it.
 
I apologize that I get thanked Andrew.

Do me a favor. Look at my avatar for at least 30 seconds.

If you can't find it in your heart to giggle and forgive me...

Then, well I have a boatload of more cute kitten pics. One of em is bound to get you to like me
 
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I don't hate you, I just don't get you lol.
 
We can agree that we don't get each other. I've read each of your posts more than 10 times. Completely lost me.

You never talk about kittens, kites, funny faces, lost love, dreams, time travel, asparagus.

Nor do you mention Jay Guidinger, Duck Duck Goose, Gulliver's Travels, and being homesick.

Not once do you give a shout out to the G-O-D, or your familia.

We were cut from a different cloth. You chose a bold white. I chose the bedazzled one donated by Jesse The Body Ventura.

Thank You for the lol. I believe the cute kitten avatar did its job.

Four score, and 7...score, ago


History Lessons
 
:chuckles:
this whole discussion with andrew is fucking hilarious.

"i apologize that your parents follow me on twitter." :rofl:

great stuff, storm.
 
Little Ladies,

Just got back from my "Should Storm Sutherland Start a Blog?" World Tour. Jam Packed. Played NBA Jam for way too long and got myself a hefty fanbase in Peru and Great Britain.

Let's step right into the dirty waters and pull out a goldy regarding all that related Cavs.

That makes it what? 42 games in a row? Not too Shabba Ranks considering most of our guards stand at the 3 pt line 90 percent of the time.

Good see to Boobs filling out his shirt like girls do. Keep gun runnin, other boys be growth stuntin.

Shaq got himself a new job. Cell provider. Covering all areas in the paint. Gets bad repcetion at the line, but no one tops him in sexting. Ask the chicas for confirmation.

LBJ. He's like 2 good players in one. You can't tell which player is doing what, you just feel comfty knowing that 2 dudes are in one body playing ridiculous. He's on that Steve Guttenberg tip. Ya'll be in cocoons. Brian Dennehy just giggled and shot me a head nod. I know the time on yo clocks.

Trade Time.

15 days will go slow. I swear to friggin God it will feel like 16 to 17 when this is all over. I set up a tent over my lappy. I sleep next to my lappy. I prepare food next to it. I quit my job. I have no fears. Christie's Cabaret will never find another Best Boy Grip. Not at my salary and skill levels.

Jamison- Still not a fan of your drink. But I never yacked it up like I did with Jack. Heard LBJ is pining for you. Just another instance confirming what I've known for 2 years. LBJ is best friends with every single player in the NBA past or present. Only Stevenson and Pierce he's omitted. Send em Z and a 1st, or D-Jax. If they say no, Danny needs to lay off the hand sitting and sit on their faces. Face Smothering style. Bizarre Fetish Included in the previous sentence.

Iggy- Send them a copy of my "Kittens Gone Cute" compilation. Shouldn't take much more than expirings along with the comp. Trust me, these kittens are effin cute. Plus, it would be nice to have a guy that can rebound, pass and defend at a high level. I'll take the iffy outside shot.

Murphy- Why do I hate his face so much? That smug look, that smudged face, that mud glance? I can't explain it. I played him in a pick up game. He rained 3's on me. I took him off the dribble at will. This is taking account my bad back and playing in heels. Don't ask. For whatever reason i thought they'd give me better lateral movement.

Stand Pat- I cannot stand Pat. Biggest jerk on my street. Always showing off his snow blower, snow plow and riding lawnmower. Meanwhile, I'm rocking a cracked snow shovel, and garden shears I use to cut 2 acres. Yeah, you got money Pat, I get it. I'm still egging your house everyday.

Standing Pat is a mistake. Don't make me text you Danny Ferry. I'm over my limit for the month.

Thanks for reading. I wrote this originally as a love letter to this chick. I got sidetracked. Only part in the love letter that remains is the sexting and boob part.

I hate spiders!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love,

Dad








bale_and_kermit.gif
 
Fuck Storm you are hilarious. If only your posts were endless.

I swear if I had been having the worst day of my life (say I found out Andrew was related to me, for instance) this dude could cheer me up and make me forget about all my troubles. Brilliant. Now lets go get Iggy or summat
 
Ah Storm, thank you for this. I needed this kind of reading first thing in the morning.
 

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