Kouki
Kouki, Not Cookie.
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In quotes because it is my girlfriend's (future fiance's) stepfather.
Could use some advice even if I don't really know what to ask, and kind of just want to talk about it I guess.
So. My girlfriend is Chinese. She came to America with her mother when her mother married her step father back in 2001 or so. Her mother has never assimilated, nor made an attempt to assimilate, to America. She can speak a tiny tiny bit of English but not much (normally I am good with people who speak broken English due to where I work, but communicating with her is challenging). She cannot get gasoline by herself, drive on the highway, or go grocery shopping to English-speaking stores (and the Chinese markets in CLE are too far, since she can't drive on highway).
So her husband, my gf's step-father, passed away unexpectedly Sunday morning. Massive heart attack. Never took care of himself (we were going through accounts all day Sunday...guy ate fast food nearly every day) and hadn't been to doctor in 5 years. Had swelling in foot and shortness of breath...too stubborn to go to doctor.
So...he had no life insurance, and he dipped heavily into his 401k last year to prevent foreclosure. I am guessing they owe more on the fourplex that they own than what it's worth. Sewer bill over 1000 behind, maybe close to 2k, but nothing else is (much, if any) overdue. I think maybe like 10k is left in the 401k.
Three cars and a boat in the driveway, cars will probably go to scrap though I might buy one for a fair price if I think I can get it running.
Tons and tons of misc stuff laying around....fishing gear, tools, lawn equip, etc.
He has three kids from previous marriage but they live a few states over.
Gf's mother is 55 and cannot receive his SSI checks until 60. With her income and renters' rent, she might net 700 a month before food/bills/handyman/etc, and 700 is probably generous.
So....yeah. This is a crummy situation. I am hosting two of his children (adults), and her mother right now. Children weren't really close to him. I offered to go through all the tools/equipment/cars, index them, offer them to his kids, buy them myself if I want them, and then list them for sale, in that order. And I offered her mom to stay with us until things settle down. That part is really scary and will absolutely put a serious strain on our relationship if it extends too much. We are financially stable but I can't afford to be giving her money to live somewhere else.
She should qualify for food stamps, I don't know anything about government-assisted living (rent) but I think her living in a typical section-8 style complex is a terrible, terrible idea.
So...um...like I said, just wanted to kind of get that all out. Any advice of any sorts is welcome. Kudos if you actually read all that.
LONG STORY SHORT - gf's step father passed away, gf's mother is Chinese and can't function by herself in America, fiscal situation is not good, and step father's family is from out of town. Tell me what to do.
Could use some advice even if I don't really know what to ask, and kind of just want to talk about it I guess.
So. My girlfriend is Chinese. She came to America with her mother when her mother married her step father back in 2001 or so. Her mother has never assimilated, nor made an attempt to assimilate, to America. She can speak a tiny tiny bit of English but not much (normally I am good with people who speak broken English due to where I work, but communicating with her is challenging). She cannot get gasoline by herself, drive on the highway, or go grocery shopping to English-speaking stores (and the Chinese markets in CLE are too far, since she can't drive on highway).
So her husband, my gf's step-father, passed away unexpectedly Sunday morning. Massive heart attack. Never took care of himself (we were going through accounts all day Sunday...guy ate fast food nearly every day) and hadn't been to doctor in 5 years. Had swelling in foot and shortness of breath...too stubborn to go to doctor.
So...he had no life insurance, and he dipped heavily into his 401k last year to prevent foreclosure. I am guessing they owe more on the fourplex that they own than what it's worth. Sewer bill over 1000 behind, maybe close to 2k, but nothing else is (much, if any) overdue. I think maybe like 10k is left in the 401k.
Three cars and a boat in the driveway, cars will probably go to scrap though I might buy one for a fair price if I think I can get it running.
Tons and tons of misc stuff laying around....fishing gear, tools, lawn equip, etc.
He has three kids from previous marriage but they live a few states over.
Gf's mother is 55 and cannot receive his SSI checks until 60. With her income and renters' rent, she might net 700 a month before food/bills/handyman/etc, and 700 is probably generous.
So....yeah. This is a crummy situation. I am hosting two of his children (adults), and her mother right now. Children weren't really close to him. I offered to go through all the tools/equipment/cars, index them, offer them to his kids, buy them myself if I want them, and then list them for sale, in that order. And I offered her mom to stay with us until things settle down. That part is really scary and will absolutely put a serious strain on our relationship if it extends too much. We are financially stable but I can't afford to be giving her money to live somewhere else.
She should qualify for food stamps, I don't know anything about government-assisted living (rent) but I think her living in a typical section-8 style complex is a terrible, terrible idea.
So...um...like I said, just wanted to kind of get that all out. Any advice of any sorts is welcome. Kudos if you actually read all that.
LONG STORY SHORT - gf's step father passed away, gf's mother is Chinese and can't function by herself in America, fiscal situation is not good, and step father's family is from out of town. Tell me what to do.
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