The mental health thread

[MGMT]

Uh, I don’t know where to start but I kind of feel like I’m in a bottomless pit of misery. It’s difficult because I tell myself I’m always where I led myself — for better or worse. So, it’s a two-pronged issue: 1.) you hate your circumstance because it sucks 2.) you hate yourself because you have led yourself to a circumstance that sucks. I have a daughter about to be 2 and I don’t ever, ever want my issues to affect my parenting so — how does one “find time” for this?

I dunno man.

J dunno

 

[Adam]

Uh, I don’t know where to start but I kind of feel like I’m in a bottomless pit of misery. It’s difficult because I tell myself I’m always where I led myself — for better or worse. So, it’s a two-pronged issue: 1.) you hate your circumstance because it sucks 2.) you hate yourself because you have led yourself to a circumstance that sucks. I have a daughter about to be 2 and I don’t ever, ever want my issues to affect my parenting so — how does one “find time” for this?

I dunno man.

J dunno

Sounds tough. I can offer some very generic advice take it if it helps.

Firstly you are stuck in a negative triad of thought. You think about the past and yourself and that affects the way you see the world and your future. The problem is that past is out of your control. You can only control the next choice you make.

As far as parenting goes it's perfectly normal to worry about screwing up your kids. Its essentially impossible to not screw them up so I'd quit worrying about it. It's better to focus on your reactions to your feelings around them. You can't be happy all the time but you can be proud of yourself if you can pretend to be happy around your children. Sometimes that can generate some momentum

 

[Phills14]

Uh, I don’t know where to start but I kind of feel like I’m in a bottomless pit of misery. It’s difficult because I tell myself I’m always where I led myself — for better or worse. So, it’s a two-pronged issue: 1.) you hate your circumstance because it sucks 2.) you hate yourself because you have led yourself to a circumstance that sucks. I have a daughter about to be 2 and I don’t ever, ever want my issues to affect my parenting so — how does one “find time” for this?

I dunno man.

J dunno

Sorry to read this man. I don't know your specific issues but I can relate to the feelings you shared. It's very easy to be stuck thinking about your issues too much. Grinding on those issues only makes it worse. You have to occupy your mind with different thoughts. Finding hobbies, getting involved in something at work or at home or in the community. Do something to change the narrative in your head so you don't spend all your time thinking about whatever is going on.

 

[David.]

Exhausted with people.

Every day my head is just filled with thoughts and conclusions that this or that person is a fucking asshole, or that I am. Everything is a fight or combat. Or letting some bullshit slide because then people will think I'm an asshole if I don't.

I'm exhausted. My aunt is in the car in front of me going on and on about some fucking dog and we're asking for her input on where to eat, my mom is asking the most ridiculous questions with obvious answers and every sentence I speak is a minefield..what isnt she going to understand? I had to re explain that I went out for a soda after a game last night 9 different times. She's a smart lady, I have no fucking clue what the disconnect is but I do not want to talk because it's going to require explaining really rudimentary things more than a handful of times

Girl I'm seeing is sitting next to me having a panic attack and obsessing about having a panic attack.

None of these people are bad people but fuck if I'm not exhausted trying to put on a happy unbothered face. I just feel like I'm surrounded by assholes and idiots wherever I go and I know I'm not any better.

Lamotrigine and prozac aren't really working. A month ago I was unstoppably happy and jovial. I just want to stay in bed, away from everyone

 

[Phills14]

Exhausted with people.

Every day my head is just filled with thoughts and conclusions that this or that person is a fucking asshole, or that I am. Everything is a fight or combat. Or letting some bullshit slide because then people will think I'm an asshole if I don't.

I'm exhausted. My aunt is in the car in front of me going on and on about some fucking dog and we're asking for her input on where to eat, my mom is asking the most ridiculous questions with obvious answers and every sentence I speak is a minefield..what isnt she going to understand? I had to re explain that I went out for a soda after a game last night 9 different times. She's a smart lady, I have no fucking clue what the disconnect is but I do not want to talk because it's going to require explaining really rudimentary things more than a handful of times

Girl I'm seeing is sitting next to me having a panic attack and obsessing about having a panic attack.

None of these people are bad people but fuck if I'm not exhausted trying to put on a happy unbothered face. I just feel like I'm surrounded by assholes and idiots wherever I go and I know I'm not any better.

Lamotrigine and prozac aren't really working. A month ago I was unstoppably happy and jovial. I just want to stay in bed, away from everyone

Sorry to read this David but glad you posted your concerns here. It helps to vent a little.

Have you gone through times like this before? What have you done to work yourself out of it?

 

[CleveRocks]

Exhausted with people.

Every day my head is just filled with thoughts and conclusions that this or that person is a fucking asshole, or that I am. Everything is a fight or combat. Or letting some bullshit slide because then people will think I'm an asshole if I don't.

I'm exhausted. My aunt is in the car in front of me going on and on about some fucking dog and we're asking for her input on where to eat, my mom is asking the most ridiculous questions with obvious answers and every sentence I speak is a minefield..what isnt she going to understand? I had to re explain that I went out for a soda after a game last night 9 different times. She's a smart lady, I have no fucking clue what the disconnect is but I do not want to talk because it's going to require explaining really rudimentary things more than a handful of times

Girl I'm seeing is sitting next to me having a panic attack and obsessing about having a panic attack.

None of these people are bad people but fuck if I'm not exhausted trying to put on a happy unbothered face. I just feel like I'm surrounded by assholes and idiots wherever I go and I know I'm not any better.

Lamotrigine and prozac aren't really working. A month ago I was unstoppably happy and jovial. I just want to stay in bed, away from everyone

People have different strategies to interaction.. my mother in law, never engages a serious conversation.. It's about the weather, how are the kid, stuff they are working with for the house/ yard.. She is a nice woman, and has been very supportive of me.. but that's the level she operates at.. no real problems, no drama..

It's boring and repetitive..Almost white noise.. But letting it get to you, is not the path.. She chooses to be this, and it works for her. Not how I roll.. But to feel negative about yourself because people around you have problems, is on you.. Everybody Struggles.. but that is not a reflection on you. It's a reflection of the human condition..

 

[LL3]

Everybody Struggles, indeed @CleveRocks . It is obvious on its face, but a good reminder all the same...we tend to forget.

Also in the obvious realm, but it has been helpful to me -- take a walk. Just go yourself and let a little of the stress burn off you with some movement and the relative quiet of the moment. If you need to focus on something, make it your breathing. Even going around the block can have some benefit...
Best to you all -- thanks for sharing.

 

[CleveRocks]

Everybody Struggles, indeed @CleveRocks . It is obvious on its face, but a good reminder all the same...we tend to forget.

Also in the obvious realm, but it has been helpful to me -- take a walk. Just go yourself and let a little of the stress burn off you with some movement and the relative quiet of the moment. If you need to focus on something, make it your breathing. Even going around the block can have some benefit...
Best to you all -- thanks for sharing.

Its my sisters motto.. Everybody Struggles, You can always start again, You can forgive yourself as well as others.

 

[N7RobBob]

Yeah, this year I have experienced my first anxiety attack and my mind has continued to over analyze absurd things. Being able to talk with people about it has help, but finding ways to overcome those difficulties has taken time and will continue to.

The past 2 years has taken its toll on most of us. This place has always been a nice distraction to any of my worries in the day to day. I've been distracted by work and not posting enough to utilize this outlet.

Here's to continued work on ourselves and trying to better ourselves any way we can.

 

[CleveRocks]

Yeah, this year I have experienced my first anxiety attack and my mind has continued to over analyze absurd things. Being able to talk with people about it has help, but finding ways to overcome those difficulties has taken time and will continue to.

The past 2 years has taken its toll on most of us. This place has always been a nice distraction to any of my worries in the day to day. I've been distracted by work and not posting enough to utilize this outlet.

Here's to continued work on ourselves and trying to better ourselves any way we can.

Or be at peace with who we are. I have worked my ass off 40 years.. but taking a minute with those friends you made along the way is the most rewarding thing..

 

[Sebastian]

I find myself having a lack of patience with Facebook.

I really have issues with the never-ending avalanche of zero-information opinions and comments on articles on science, history, etc.

What used to be a forum for discussion on interesting topics with well-informed people has turned into a tsunami of morons that don't know anything sharing their worthless opinions at best, and simply trolling at worst.

I generally enjoy opposing views. But the requirement is basic knowledge.

I think it used to be that people did not speak up on a topic unless they knew something about it. Because why look like a fool? But it seems like actin a fool is rewarded. And there is no longer discourse. But just a river of shit.

I feel like patience is a virtue I need to nurture more. But it becomes harder. Either with age, or as society changes.

I feel like I am not as patient as I used to be even two years ago.

 

[Man Called X]

I find myself having a lack of patience with Facebook.

I really have issues with the never-ending avalanche of zero-information opinions and comments on articles on science, history, etc.

What used to be a forum for discussion on interesting topics with well-informed people has turned into a tsunami of morons that don't know anything sharing their worthless opinions at best, and simply trolling at worst.

I generally enjoy opposing views. But the requirement is basic knowledge.

I think it used to be that people did not speak up on a topic unless they knew something about it. Because why look like a fool? But it seems like actin a fool is rewarded. And there is no longer discourse. But just a river of shit.

I feel like patience is a virtue I need to nurture more. But it becomes harder. Either with age, or as society changes.

I feel like I am not as patient as I used to be even two years ago.

When FB started, it was just college kids. Then they opened it to the masses, and it became a shitshow. It used to annoy the hell out of me every time someone would share a pseudoscience article that shoving cottage cheese in your ass would cure cancer (The Budwig Protocol) and other such nonsense. I used to accept it was just the really gullible that fell for that shit. But in the last 6 years, there's been a clear stupidening of the masses.

Years past, you would mock and shun the local nutjob that shared conspiracy theories and those people kept to their dark corners and didn't infect people with misinformation. All the last 6 years has done is embolden people to be stupid and pretend we live in 1952 again. But I guess that's what happens when you give nutjobs a place to congregate and have their own echo chamber.

 

[Lee]

When FB started, it was just college kids. Then they opened it to the masses, and it became a shitshow. It used to annoy the hell out of me every time someone would share a pseudoscience article that shoving cottage cheese in your ass would cure cancer (The Budwig Protocol) and other such nonsense. I used to accept it was just the really gullible that fell for that shit. But in the last 6 years, there's been a clear stupidening of the masses.

Years past, you would mock and shun the local nutjob that shared conspiracy theories and those people kept to their dark corners and didn't infect people with misinformation. All the last 6 years has done is embolden people to be stupid and pretend we live in 1952 again. But I guess that's what happens when you give nutjobs a place to congregate and have their own echo chamber.

Wait a minute, are you saying i am shoving cottage cheese in my ass for nothing?

 

[Hurl Bruce]

It's always perplexing when people who seemingly have everything going their way end their life. Reach out to someone if you're really feeling it.

 

[Scrote Squad]

It's always perplexing when people who seemingly have everything going their way end their life. Reach out to someone if you're really feeling it.

I'll address a couple of things about mental health.

1. Stigma. The most common reason that people don't get the help they need is because of the stigma that surrounds therapy, particularly in men. Even people that are not suicidal or clinically depressed could benefit greatly from therapy. I've been in therapy for the last year or so and it's amazing the weight that I carried around. Small things that you would never register to someone that isn't trained in the field can have a dramatic impact on how we turn out as adults. Everyone, and I really do mean everyone, could benefit from regular therapy.

2. Funding. Therapy requires co-pays, insurance, or completely out-of-pocket cash. The majority of Americans don't have access to insurance or the requisite funds to get help. This system should be overhauled completely.

3. This is directly related to your comments - rationality. Clinical depression, PPD, etc. alter the chemistry of your brain. It's rational to sit back and say, "reach out and get help if you need it." BUT...the chemical makeup of your brain isn't rational. It doesn't follow principles of logic. For many people that commit suicide stemming from depression, it doesn't even register in their brains to get professional help. For many others, see 1 and 2.

4. Shortage of trained therapists. There is an incredible shortage of therapists in the US (and I would guess the world, too). If you took the time to call around, there are many places in the US where you can't even find a therapist that is accepting new patients.

5. Understanding. This kind of goes with number 1, but have you ever tried to use a sick day to refresh your head? Most workplaces wouldn't entertain that as an acceptable reason to call off work. Ever expressed your depressed feelings via social media? Most likely not. People use social media to present a life that is entirely different than the one they actually lead.

I could add additional bullet points, but I think we are going to see a major mental health crisis in the world over the next decade. The COViD isolation did a number on many people. People express that isolation through anger, fear, violence, buying unnecessary things, etc. Basically, every unhealthy way to express emotion. In most of Europe, they have what's called 'burnout.' When you reach the point of burnout, you can take extended paid leave to recharge your physical, emotional, and mental health. That concept would get you laughed out of most offices in the US. There is a lot that we should do regarding mental health in this country, but very likely won't. It's incredible to expect someone in their mid 20's to worry about family, work, relationships, extracurriculars, bills, debt, physical/emotional/mental health without needing help.