Well, I'm sure nobody cares that much but it's definitely cathartic for me to keep posting in here. I reread this thread once every week or so, I'd say. It helps keep me focused and my mindset healthy. Been a hit or miss summer. On the con side, I'd say I lost another small group of people I considered "friends"/acquaintances for a variety of reasons I won't go into. A huge part of it was me just wanting to wash my hands of all the fake people that call themselves your friend but only when it's convenient for them, I am old enough to be sick of that, I'd rather have a few really goddam solid friends than a dozen fake motherfuckers who just ask for favors or never drive out to chill at your neck of the woods. Another part of it had to do with a girl that was in that circle of friends, so you can add lady drama to my list of issues (long story short: being messed with by her, totally, mentally- we've all been there, right?). But fuck it, I have/am in the process of washing my hands of that entire situation. Just do not need it and there are plenty of people out there in this town waiting to be true, genuine friends. That leaves my Columbus confidant count at about...1, with a few acquaintances that aren't total pieces of shit that I talk to here and there on the side as well. :chuckles: Yeah, not good on that note. Not trying to make this into the diary of a teenage girl or something, but I'm a social dude and being lonely affects my mood and motivation a hell of a lot.
On the plus side? I'm officially getting back into OSU, starting next month. Loans are coming in, everything looks good, and it appears I'm going to get my chance to go back and earn an engineering degree at age 24. Not too old, right? I'm super excited about it. Going to be a hell of a lot of work but I'm going to ease into it. Linking this to the above paragraph, I honestly don't know if this is okay for me to say but ... I'm almost just as excited to meet tons of new people as I am to study engineering. I mean I'm hoping being only 24 I'm not that creepy "older dude still in college." :chuckles: Point is it's hard to meet people after college- I spent the last two years trying to do it and have only lost friends and have pretty much struck out on the opposite sex in those two years since graduating with my first degree (like I said, my last relationship ended my last year of college- and it wasn't even terribly serious, in hindsight). Maybe it's kind of a second chance to network for real, make some real fucking bonds that are stronger this time around. I dunno. One thing I do know is living on the east side near Bexley is for the fucking dogs- that is seriously about 48.56% of my bad moods at this point, I have ZERO in common with people in this area, there is ZERO shit to do and I'm right next to the ghetto. Get me back to campus, pleeeeease.
Anyways, other than that, I'm staying out of the shit. Doing what little I can right now but if things are really going to get significantly better I imagine I'll know next month when classes start. That will be an exciting time. In the mean time- if anybody is older and has/is going back to college for another degree or even graduate studies, feedback on what it is like would be appreciated. I'm excited but also SUPER nervous, like how will people view me, will I be able to handle engineering courses, making it fit with a work schedule, etc. All stuff to be nervous about. I wish there were some grants for men going back to school, too, but I'm not sure there is much out there unless I'm a chick and knocked up 30+ years old. My FAFSA only brought back loans - albeit, plenty of loans. But still, just loans.
Anyway, still climbing, guys. Nowhere near the summit but I'm not on the ground gasping for air, either. there's hope yet.
