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This is a thread for discovering you have a food allergy... and the unpleasant repercussions.
I've always eaten pineapple. I fucking love pineapple. Usually it came to me in a jar with chunks of it floating in a plastic tub. I worked as a cook for a while in college and used this pre-chopped product all the time in Hawaiian pizzas.
Last Saturday, I threw a great barbecue for my young Thor's birthday. I diced two FRESH pineapples and served them as addendums to the skewers as well as grilled separately for the kids. I've previously heard that some people have adverse reactions to raw pineapple, so I thought I was being careful by serving grilled pineapple to kids. The freshly cut pineapple juice covered my hands and mouth.
I probably started feeling the headaches, fever, and sore throat right after chopping, but I was hosting a big party. I ignored feeling sick and started drinking beers. Six hours passed, and I handled all the raw meat, veggies, and pineapple with my bare hands. I served the cooked product with my trusty grilling tools.
Evidence exists on facebook of what I looked like after touching the pineapple all day... I look like fat early 80s William Shatner with a beard. My body was toxic and bloated. However, my kid was opening presents; I didn't notice.
Sunday I assumed I had a cold and rested up. My wife convinced me to take a bath, which was wonderful. I swear my balls haven't smelled this good in years. I still felt like crap and couldn't eat anything aside from flavorless leftover potato salad and ice cream.
This morning, my hands felt itchy. Then they hurt. Then red spots showed up. Then my entire body felt like a pin cushion. I suddenly remembered my brother-in-law describing why he doesn't eat shrimp. FUCK.
Now I am covered in semi-itchy and semi-stinging hives. It has just traveled from my hands and throat to my entire body. I can barely sleep. THIS SUCKS.
+++Coincidentally, as an aside, I was recently told Thor broke the top fifteen in baby boy names this past year. For clarification: That name is totally white trash for a child. It's like calling your kid Megatron. For the sake of the website, I have a pen name for my kid... he isn't actually Thor. That shit is terrible.
I've always eaten pineapple. I fucking love pineapple. Usually it came to me in a jar with chunks of it floating in a plastic tub. I worked as a cook for a while in college and used this pre-chopped product all the time in Hawaiian pizzas.
Last Saturday, I threw a great barbecue for my young Thor's birthday. I diced two FRESH pineapples and served them as addendums to the skewers as well as grilled separately for the kids. I've previously heard that some people have adverse reactions to raw pineapple, so I thought I was being careful by serving grilled pineapple to kids. The freshly cut pineapple juice covered my hands and mouth.
I probably started feeling the headaches, fever, and sore throat right after chopping, but I was hosting a big party. I ignored feeling sick and started drinking beers. Six hours passed, and I handled all the raw meat, veggies, and pineapple with my bare hands. I served the cooked product with my trusty grilling tools.
Evidence exists on facebook of what I looked like after touching the pineapple all day... I look like fat early 80s William Shatner with a beard. My body was toxic and bloated. However, my kid was opening presents; I didn't notice.
Sunday I assumed I had a cold and rested up. My wife convinced me to take a bath, which was wonderful. I swear my balls haven't smelled this good in years. I still felt like crap and couldn't eat anything aside from flavorless leftover potato salad and ice cream.
This morning, my hands felt itchy. Then they hurt. Then red spots showed up. Then my entire body felt like a pin cushion. I suddenly remembered my brother-in-law describing why he doesn't eat shrimp. FUCK.
Now I am covered in semi-itchy and semi-stinging hives. It has just traveled from my hands and throat to my entire body. I can barely sleep. THIS SUCKS.
+++Coincidentally, as an aside, I was recently told Thor broke the top fifteen in baby boy names this past year. For clarification: That name is totally white trash for a child. It's like calling your kid Megatron. For the sake of the website, I have a pen name for my kid... he isn't actually Thor. That shit is terrible.
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