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What are your sources of self esteem?

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David.

David.

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What makes you feel good about yourself?

Tryingtk become more balanced and diversify from just hitting on girls.

I've got

1. Performing Music
2. Make good money
3. Looking good
4. Being intellectually curious and know a thing or two about a thing or two
5. Socially calibrated.
6. Softball

Whatcha got?
 
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I didnt look at your list before I made mine. Then when I went back found it’s very similar. Shock.

Athletic endeavors
Sense of humor/social skills
Parenting capabilities
Intellectual curiosity/constantly learning by reading or podcasts

On a sidenote...My job doesnt do it any more. I dont care about it. I make good money doing it but it doesnt make me happy and hasn’t for a long time. Hence why I’m going to try to make a radical change here, worst case I have a fun new hobby.

I’ve started deflecting from my job at parties/events and when I meet people and they ask what I do for a living, I’ve explained briefly and then move on to their interests and mine as quickly as possible. I’ve also stopped asking people what they do for a living and instead engage them on topics about what they’re interested in. I find it much more enjoyable and it makes for better conversations.
 
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The Oi said:
I didnt look at your list before I made mine. Then when I went back found it’s very similar. Shock.

Athletic endeavors
Sense of humor/social skills
Parenting capabilities
Intellectual curiosity/constantly learning by reading or podcasts

On a sidenote...My job doesnt do it any more. I dont care about it. I make good money doing it but it doesnt make me happy and hasn’t for a long time. Hence why I’m going to try to make a radical change here, worst case I have a fun new hobby.

I’ve started deflecting from my job at parties/events and when I meet people and they ask what I do for a living, I’ve explained briefly and then move on to their interests and mine as quickly as possible. I’ve also stopped asking people what they do for a living and instead engage them on topics about what they’re interested in. I find it much more enjoyable and it makes for better conversations.
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Yea I actually feel pretty badly about mine. Not exactly much prestige. It just works so well for me and my schedule. People judge you on what you do, and hard. Telling people requires some obfuscation, qualifying it with "i have an accounting degree but", and i have to really go out of my way to imply that it makes a lot more than you'd think.

I don't want to talk about it at all. People think you're a dumb piece of shit and pussy dries up so fast if you're not white collar.
 
Good list Dave. I'll add...
  • Meditation
  • Positive affirmations: "Every day, in every way, I am getting better, and better"
  • Play with dogs
  • Make other people laugh/ smile
  • Take amazing care of a plant
I'm no life coach, but I've learned to meditate over this past year, and it's really helped clear a lot of brain fog and improve my overall health. It helps me prioritize goals, grieve, and come up with new ideas.

Even taking just a couple minutes to control your breathing helps. Close your eyes, take a deep-breath in through both nostrils, hold for 6-7 seconds, exhale slowly. Clear your mind, and breathe. It's like plugging your brain into a charger. You will literally hear the electricty flowing inside your head. Let it work, allow thoughts to come and go, and just keep resetting yourself.
 
I don't see self esteem and feel good as necessary the same thing, although sometimes they can be combined.

Music makes me feel good, I don't know that it adds to self esteem.

Adds to self esteem:
- spending time with my family
- providing for my family
- improving my health
- problem solving (programming, running our business, etc)
- having our company succeed and grow/creating jobs for all of our employees

So I try to work in things that make me feel good into those.

For example, I enjoy playing virtual reality and playing virtual reality games by itself doesn't necessarily improve self esteem. I suppose improving and beating prior high scores can. But I use it to exercise, which helps improve my health, which adds to my self esteem. I don't have the patience to get exercise from things I don't enjoy while I'm doing them.

It can be challenging to figure out how to balance all of this because there are so often not enough hours in the day and the time required for one conflicts with the time required for others.

When things run smoothly, all of the weight I carry on my shoulders is great for self esteem, when there are problems, it can be overwhelming. That's another part of balancing, I have projects I want to do, things that would be fun to do, and rewarding when they are done, but also things that add to the weight on my shoulders and potential for that becoming overwhelming.
 
KI4MVP said:
I don't see self esteem and feel good as necessary the same thing, although sometimes they can be combined.

Music makes me feel good, I don't know that it adds to self esteem.

Adds to self esteem:
- spending time with my family
- providing for my family
- improving my health
- problem solving (programming, running our business, etc)
- having our company succeed and grow/creating jobs for all of our employees

So I try to work in things that make me feel good into those.

For example, I enjoy playing virtual reality and playing virtual reality games by itself doesn't necessarily improve self esteem. I suppose improving and beating prior high scores can. But I use it to exercise, which helps improve my health, which adds to my self esteem. I don't have the patience to get exercise from things I don't enjoy while I'm doing them.

It can be challenging to figure out how to balance all of this because there are so often not enough hours in the day and the time required for one conflicts with the time required for others.

When things run smoothly, all of the weight I carry on my shoulders is great for self esteem, when there are problems, it can be overwhelming. That's another part of balancing, I have projects I want to do, things that would be fun to do, and rewarding when they are done, but also things that add to the weight on my shoulders and potential for that becoming overwhelming.
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Entirely different. Drugs and eating junk food make you feel good but they're not things thag make you feel good about yourself.

Things you're proud of. Things you're good at.

Like when I said music,. I mean writing and performing for an audience and doing well, not that I like to listen to music
 
David. said:
Entirely different. Drugs and eating junk food make you feel good but they're not things thag make you feel good about yourself.

Things you're proud of. Things you're good at.

Like when I said music,. I mean writing and performing for an audience and doing well, not that I like to listen to music
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oh, okay, I completely misread that. That has to feel great, my only musical talent is knowing how to hit the play button. Growing up I always wanted to be able to sit down and play anything I wanted to on the piano, lessons didn't help at all.
 
KI4MVP said:
oh, okay, I completely misread that. That has to feel great, my only musical talent is knowing how to hit the play button. Growing up I always wanted to be able to sit down and play anything I wanted to on the piano, lessons didn't help at all.
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Piano is hard as shit dude.

If you're still into it I'd start with bass and then move onto guitar
 
David. said:
Piano is hard as shit dude.

If you're still into it I'd start with bass and then move onto guitar
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maybe when I retire, not enough hours in the day right now. And I tend to gravitate to the hardest to learn things. I took up poker a few years ago, the only game i bothered to learn is no limit texas hold 'em, the hardest poker game there is.
 
Having women admire my body did it for a time, but that's come and gone. Feels shallow now.

Honestly making people laugh is probably one of my greatest sources of self-esteem. I love it.
 
Yea that's dangerous too. Like some days you don't get the attention and you start to look for it. Even a neutral response is a bad one. Can't have your self worth determined by it.

That's why I made this thread. Looking for other things to tap into
Rich said:
Having women admire my body did it for a time, but that's come and gone. Feels shallow now.

Honestly making people laugh is probably one of my greatest sources of self-esteem. I love it.
Click to expand...
 
Rich said:
Having women admire my body did it for a time, but that's come and gone. Feels shallow now.

Honestly making people laugh is probably one of my greatest sources of self-esteem. I love it.
Click to expand...

I constantly try to say funny things, my oldest daughter tells me my jokes aren't funny, I tell her the only problem with my jokes is the audience. :chuckle:
 
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