Random Thoughts for people in their 20s and 30s

[ChicagoCavFan]

Found this, and had to share with you fools. Some are classic - and many have been considered by me.

Random thoughts from people in their 20s and 30s:

-I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can
think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell
my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves
me.

-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you
realize you're wrong.

-I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to
have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and
sticks when they've invented the lighter?

-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're
going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to
be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the
direction from which you came, you have to first do something like
check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to
yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're
crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

-That's enough, Nickelback.

-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was
younger.

-Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know"
feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose
not to be friends with?

-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't
work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically
fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all
know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards
or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft. :chuckles:

-There is a great need for sarcasm font.

-Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and
suddenly realize I had no idea what the (heck) was going on when I first
saw it.

-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually
becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting
90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's
laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little
bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the
only one who really, really gets it.

-How the (heck) are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than
take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear
your computer history if you die.

-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to
finish a text. Appropriate with other thread...

- A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the
spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

- Was learning cursive really necessary?

- Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to
say".

- I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

- Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron
test is absolutely petrifying.

- My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads.
Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired
about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us."
Classy, bro.

- Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart",
all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod
and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

- I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up
to prevent a (jerk) from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

- Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in'
examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete
idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and
said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

-What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each
other?

- While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and
instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

- MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I
know how to get out of my neighborhood.

- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the
person died.

- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the
shower first and THEN turn on the water.

-Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever.

- I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu'
to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an
overweight woman. Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."

-I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

- Bad decisions make good stories

-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their
profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got
the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if
I do!

- Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

-If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring
would probably just be completely invisible.

-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go
around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly
nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be
a problem....

-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work
when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything
productive for the rest of the day.

-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't
want to have to restart my collection.

-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are
going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me
if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I
swear I did not make any changes to.

- "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people
watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will
they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't
watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and
leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?
Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and
goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone
and run away?

- I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not
seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

-When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she
hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light
internet stalking.

-I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle,
then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

-Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising
speed for pedophiles...

- As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers,
but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still
not know what time it is.

-It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to
answer when they call.

-Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to
with it.

-Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car
keys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the
Donkey - but I’d bet my (rear) everyone can find and push the Snooze
button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time
every time...

-My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would
happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the (heck) do I respond to that?

-It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and
the link takes me to a video instead of text.

-I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they
drive behind obeys the speed limit.

-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

-I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

-The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw
they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words,
someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think
about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people
eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by
myself. There's nothing like being made to feel like a fat ...
before dinner

 

[Chardon]

Re: Random Thoughts

Funniest stuff i have ever read.

 

[Walter White]

Re: Random Thoughts

- Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to
say".

LOL ROFL LMAO HAHA :chuckles:

 

[doughboy90650]

The Nintendo Cartridge trick was often enhanced after the blowing portion by sticking in the actual case on top of the cartridge while inside the console...... gotta love that.

 

[CavsFinals2016]

Is it bad that I actually think about 90% of those things?

In fact, I'm a little paranoid now and I feel like I'm on the Truman Show.

 

[Remi]

The fact that I have thought about almost all of these is what makes it funny. Kind of reassuring knowing your not the only one.

 

[Silky Smooth]

I got one.

What about today's cartoons? They suck. The cartoons back in the day were way better. The only good cartoon today is SpongeBob. What happened to the cartoons like Mortal Kombat, Superman, Batman, Spiderman, Gargoyales, even Pokemon. I miss the good ol' days.

 

[Chardon]

even Pokemon.

Have you seen the pokemon today. They look gayer then ever. I remember the days of 150.

 

[Adam]

i rewatched an old GI JOE the other day, god it was awful, but he-man was amazing

 

[Maximus]

-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people
watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will
they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't
watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and
leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

I hate when my friends or family members(or God forbid - my father) have the remote in THEIR hands. It's going to happen eventually, my father will accidentaly hit the "DVR List" button and then he will disown me when he sees nothing but "Big Brother 11", "The Hills" or "Gossip Girl".

I also hate that I can no longer use the private bathroom in my own office. It was inevitable that everytime I would go in there one of my idiot employees or the one hot chick would come into my office hollering my name...at first I would sheepishly say "I'll be out in minute". Then I got tricky and I'd stay quiet, but a minute later I would be getting paged throughout the building over the office intercom. Even worse was when they would walk into my office a few minute after I had finished using the bathroom. It was embarrassing as hell when you saw their faces suddenly contort after the stench hit their olfactory nerve....their eyes would always wander over to the bathroom wondering what I had just done or to try and catch a glance of a murdered corpse. :chuckles: My genius solution was to lock my office door to give me a nice barrier and some time to let the smell clear out. That created an entirely new problem. I would then hear people knocking or ringing my office phone. When I'd finally unlock the door and ask around to see who was looking for me, I was convinced they all thought I was masturbating.
Now I'm so neurotic, I just drive home.

 

[kookoo]

Thunder Cats and Dexter's lab FTW.

 

[kookoo]

I hate when my friends or family members(or God forbid - my father) have the remote in THEIR hands. It's going to happen eventually, my father will accidentaly hit the "DVR List" button and then he will disown me when he sees nothing but "Big Brother 11", "The Hills" or "Gossip Girl".

I also hate that I can no longer use the private bathroom in my own office. It was inevitable that everytime I would go in there one of my idiot employees or the one hot chick would come into my office hollering my name...at first I would sheepishly say "I'll be out in minute". Then I got tricky and I'd stay quiet, but a minute later I would be getting paged throughout the building over the office intercom. Even worse was when they would walk into my office a few minute after I had finished using the bathroom. It was embarrassing as hell when you saw their faces suddenly contort after the stench hit their olfactory nerve....their eyes would always wander over to the bathroom wondering what I had just done or to try and catch a glance of a murdered corpse. :chuckles: My genius solution was to lock my office door to give me a nice barrier and some time to let the smell clear out. That created an entirely new problem. I would then hear people knocking or ringing my office phone. When I'd finally unlock the door and ask around to see who was looking for me, I was convinced they all thought I was masturbating.
Now I'm so neurotic, I just drive home.

At least you have a private bathroom. I'm stuck masturbating into the urinal like the common folk.

 

[SanduskyCav]

How old are some of you? People really used to watch Pokemon???

 

[MJA1080]

-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?
Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and
goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone
and run away?

This list is awesome and this one drives me the most nuts. I mean come on, you just called me. Did you have the be the one to call me or it wasn't worth it? Then I'm always dying to know what the person wanted. Did they just get attacked? Was I their only call and I missed it. God, I'm only 19... am i neurotic lol

Oh and yes, I watched Pokemon like my life depended on it! I played the games, had the cards, hell I had the card game for Game Boy. I was intense.

 

[ChicagoCavFan]

Regarding cartoons...I can't speak for today's because I don't have kids yet, but thinking back - they were violent. Wile E Coyote trying to blow up the road runner, Elmer Fudd hunting a rabbit, etc etc - violence like that would not fly in a cartoon today (well, that's an assumption).

Regarding office bathrooms - was told a story this past weekend by my brother that is hilarious. He works in an 8 story building in a suburb of Columbus - their office is on the 2nd floor. The top floor is not fully occupied, so they have discovered that that is a good bathroom to utilize. The 4th floor has a similar situation, and is used by people in their office as well. It is actually a single toilet bathroom, so the door can be locked. There is a cleaning lady that does not speak much English - she knocks on the door and waits for a response - if none, she goes in and cleans up. However, for some reason, she waits outside the door if someone responds from inside.

Its about 9 am, and my brother uses the 8th floor restroom. Sure enough, the lady knocks and he says he is in there. Finishes up, leaves the bathroom and acknowledges the lady as he passes her.

After lunch, my brother needs the restroom again (these are deuces by the way). The 8th floor is occupied, so he heads down to the 4th floor. Midway through, a knock on the door. Same cleaning lady, my brother says he is in there. He finishes, cleans up and walks out, nodding to the patiently waiting cleaning woman. She must think he is some kind of freak.

The way their office is positioned, they can see the cleaning woman come to their floor to begin her rounds. The office is comprised of 7 people (2 women, but they talk about shitting all the time). So the office tells my brother to head to the restroom when she gets down there. Eventually this occurs, and my brother heads to the restroom on their floor. He waits for a bit, then hears a knock. He says it is occupied (same voice as the other 2 situations), and proceeds to wet his face with water. He walks out a moment later, acknowledging the cleaning woman. Safe to say, she has a story about the skinny guy that shits at least 3 times a day.