It's ridiculously hard to makes friends as an adult

[arglebargle]

OP, Have you considered you just have a terrible personality, are boring, and people don’t like you?

This has not ever occurred to me even once.

 

[The Oi]

This has not ever occurred to me even once.

It had always been my issue. I started taking personality classes from @Mr. Orange and things immediately got better.

You know that whole stretch where there were those pickup artists on tv that didn’t seem like they knew a goddamn thing about women?

I took that approach to the classes Orange was teaching me and the friends started rolling in. I was Mr Popularity at my furry conference last week in Tulsa!

 

[Phills14]

It had always been my issue. I started taking personality classes from @Mr. Orange and things immediately got better.

You know that whole stretch where there were those pickup artists on tv that didn’t seem like they knew a goddamn thing about women?

I took that approach to the classes Orange was teaching me and the friends started rolling in. I was Mr Popularity at my furry conference last week in Tulsa!

I knew that was you!!

 

[Mr. Orange]

This has not ever occurred to me even once.

Just a piss take.

Hobbies first, friends second. Examples: Rock climbing gym, Browns Backer Bar, rec leagues at the Y, gym buddies, quiz night teams, and if you are really lonely…church. Don’t be a weirdo either. Most people only have a few close friends.

 

[PIP]

OP, Have you considered you just have a terrible personality, are boring, and people don’t like you?

Mental health advocate

 

[The Human Q-Tip]

I focus on listening instead of talking about myself.

If you don't listen to someone, you'll never learn if you have enough in common to become good friends. So it is less a "trick" to get people to like you than it is an absolute necessity to figure out if this is someone you even want to be good friends with you, and vice-versa.

It's the same with women/romantic relationships -- there is nothing better when meeting someone than if she starts talking about stuff that you already like. No different with friendships. Probably even more important.

 

[inliner311]

Our friend circle got bigger by simply inviting current friends over and telling them to bring another friend or two with them, we did this for big days, like my wife's birthday or a big bbq outside, crawfish / shrimp boil ect.

This is good advice. I've always made more friends from my friend's friends. You will gravitate towards some and others you might not. I have no problem hanging out with terrible people for alittle while because I have found that they will have some good people in their circles that want better people to hang out with. Just keep working through people until you find a group you like. You will also get invited to more things too.

 

[Sebastian]

I knew that was you!!

That one on the left, goat?, is a Nazi to boot!

 

[WellYouNeednt]

Had to reread this because I thought you said your gorgeous wife had an 8 inch cock.

Spoiler

He did and she does.

 

[Coyote850]

Join a sports league...I did this years ago and it made it pretty easy. Since then I've made some of the best friends I've ever had in my life.

This. I joined a pool league and made a dozen new friends just from that. Pool, darts, bowling.... try something to get you interacting with new people.

 

[bronko]

This. I joined a pool league and made a dozen new friends just from that. Pool, darts, bowling.... try something to get you interacting with new people.

Great activities for meeting people. Each one will introduce you to a hundred new people. I've played them all, add softball, golf, fishing and I can name a few or more lifelong friends from each sport and they stay pals when I stop doing the activity regularly. It's tough to make friends from the couch.

 

[inliner311]

Still not cool.

View attachment 8130

I feel like we should make captions for this photo.

"What happens when your Grandpa married a younger women but only will let her wear clothes from your Grandma's wardrobe"

 

[letgocavs]

I'm not lying to you. When i became an adult I gave up on having friends. I go out 3 times for family holidays. I'm an extreme hermit. I do have a gf or two during the year. I go to gym, work and nothing else.

 

[arglebargle]

Just a piss take.

Hobbies first, friends second. Examples: Rock climbing gym, Browns Backer Bar, rec leagues at the Y, gym buddies, quiz night teams, and if you are really lonely…church. Don’t be a weirdo either. Most people only have a few close friends.

Guessing I didn't make my sarcasm obvious enough.

Plenty of good suggestions here.

 

[Sebastian]

Making friends as an adult just sucks. Really, I haven't made a new friend in years. Possibly decades. The friends I did once have are now - just like me - too busy with life. Kids, taking care of aging and sick parents, and so on. Social media is no real substitute. And I've found that this long into Covid now, people have taken to sharing less and less about themselves or their families. It doesn't help that I'm the classic introvert, and being around other people wear me the fuck out. It doesn't matter if it was a good or bad interaction.

Anyone else dealing with this? What do you do to address this in your life?

It really isn't an issue with you.

It's people getting tied down with families as they age. And families literally take up too much damn time.

Particularly if you are a guy the dynamic really changes because in many instances, women see the family unit as the preferred social group from the start.

Men literally get tied down to it after having spent time in a large group dynamic. This is not bullshit, if one studies evolutionary psychology one sees it is very much a thing in how the two sexes operate.

One notes that outside the bonds of the nuclear family unit, men still stay in large peer groups. Look at gay men, they still operate socially the way young men do in college and young adulthood: large groups of friends interacting with other social networks (Lesbians have smaller peer groups).

So, in any event, what to do to make more friends? You really have to work at it if you are married and find a way to deliberately balance your home life and friends in a way that won't make your spouse mad. Ideally, husband and wife can share friends that are mutually acceptable.

And it takes work, because there are only so many hours married people can devote to friends. Taking up a group hobby is a quick way to make friends. And just be the best you possible.

Or, you can sign up with the gays. They'll need a headshot.