The Rise of Skywalker spoilers thread

[macbdog]

I thought it was decent. My expectations were low, though, I just shut my brain off and enjoyed it for what it was. IMO Abrams was shoehorning in much of what he wanted for TLJ into this flick (the stuff Rian threw over Luke's shoulder into the sea) so certain plot points got rushed or left to exposition- including Palpatines return, which would have been best as the end of TLJ.

I don't get being upset over Palp's return, it was hinted at from the prequels that he found ways to overcome death. I swear I have heard Star Wars nerds point out for years that a fleet could be hiding in the Nether Regions or whatever they are called. Again, I think the time crunch was at fault and maybe even a few months more to edit/reshoot could have fixed some of the flaws. I think it was a fitting end to a flawed trilogy. Time to move on to other stories- like Poe and Finn's burgeoning romance.

 

[Jack Brickman]

Much of the new mythos in the prequels adds little, detracts from the original story, or is just dumb. Pod-racing was cool. Darth Maul looks cool but is literally just evil looking bad guy the character. Did we need a fat guy in a 50s diner? Or midichlorians? Or a bunch of battles between clones and robots that mean nothing?

The lightsaber duels in the prequels are also overrated. Mostly sterile, over choreographed fanboy shit.

There wasn’t much to the dueling in this new trilogy, but at least they spent less time spamming the lightsaber button. They still haven’t figured out how to make the duels have weight like the original trilogy. The Obi-Wan v Anakin fight tried to have something going on but failed to land because we knew how it would end and they go to ridiculous lengths to make it “epic.” The last two movies barely tried to have duels in the traditional sense. While the specific powers Rey had bothered me, at least TFA built up to the moment when she Force pulled the saber to herself.

All three of the new movies are superior to all of the prequels IMO, but I’m gonna rewatch the prequels and see if my mind changes at all.

Edit: Something dumb from the prequels AND sequels? The overuse of the blast shield helmet/shooty ball as apparently the only training instrument for Jedi in the entire universe. COME UP WITH SOMETHING NEW! As Plinkett spells out in his reviews, it originally felt like an improvised exercise from Obi-Wan, not some officially licenses Jedi Council bullshit. A perfect example of how over-reliant new movies are on old imagery.

EDIT2: Re-watched Phantom Menace and Clones and wow... Just horrendous. TROS is a clusterfuck, but at least they feel like competently made movies with genuine attempts at emotion. It was so bad and I even got high just to make them better, still awful. Revenge of the Sith has gotten the most post-sequel rehab, but I doubt it holds up any better. Honestly, going back to the prequels only reinforced how I felt about them. Needed to re-watch Empire to get the bad taste out of my mouth.

Granted I haven't seen the new movie yet, but there has yet to be a lightsaber fight in any Star Wars film that has the weight of when Luke finally snaps and just beats the shit out of Vader. There's no complex choreography or anything like that, but that moment of him just hammering away at Vader while the Emperor gleefully laughs is incredible, and it's exactly the kind of emotion and character investment that every Star Wars movie since has lacked.

The one scene that comes close since Return of the Jedi is that incredible Darth Vader scene in Rogue One. It's not a duel, obviously, but I think it captures the abject terror that would be facing a powerful Jedi in a squad of regular dudes, and it's honestly the one time since Empire that we've really seen what Vader can do.


A shame we haven't gotten more Star Wars like that.

It's also hard to believe that's the same whiny pussy from the prequels.

 

[The Human Q-Tip]

Honestly if he wanted to split it in two to tell a better story?

JJ was right because TLJ did so much damage to the story. Needing two films to cancel out TLJ seems reasonable.

The story Abrams was trying to tell sucked donkey balls., and he did get two movies to tell his story. The problem was that the first story he chose to tell -- The Force Awakens -- was a regurgitated version of the original Star Wars ("Starkiller Base" -- really???), completely lacking in originality or interesting characters, that explained absolutely nothing about what transpired between ROTJ and TFA. It created no compelling narrative arc to drive the second and third movies unless Rian Johnson wanted to serve up a similarly regurgitated mess of ESB, leading to an inevitably regurgitated version of Return of the Jedi.



Johnson rightly said fuck that, and so tried to tell a more original story of his own. Yes, TLJ sucked, and left the trilogy in a shitty place for the final movie. But again, Abrams has nobody but himself to blame for that. The rotted foundation of the trilogy was the first movie, which was one of the most unoriginal pieces of fan service slop I've ever had the misery to view - much less actually pay for.

Poor J.J.. He got to the third movie and had to "heroically" fix what Rian Johnson had done. Fuck J.J. It was his unoriginal crapfest of a first movie that doomed that trilogy right from that start, and he deserves every possible scrap of blame for everything that was less than perfect in ROS. Which was pretty much everything other than Ian McDiarmid's performance.

 

[Sebastian]

The story Abrams was trying to tell sucked donkey balls., and he did get two movies to tell his story. The problem was that the first story he chose to tell -- The Force Awakens -- was a regurgitated version of the original Star Wars ("Starkiller Base" -- really???), completely lacking in originality or interesting characters, that explained absolutely nothing about what transpired because ROTJ and TFA. It created no compelling narrative arc to drive the second and third movies unless Rian Johnson wanted to serve up a similarly regurgitated mess of ESB, leading to an inevitably regurgitated version of Return of the Jedi.

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Johnson rightly said fuck that, and so tried to tell a more original story of his own. Yes, TLJ sucked, and left the trilogy in a shitty place for the final movie. But again, Abrams has nobody but himself to blame for that. The rotted foundation of the trilogy was the first movie, which was one of the most unoriginal pieces of fan service slop I've ever had the misery to view - much less actually pay for.

Poor J.J.. He got to the third movie and had to "heroically" fix what Rian Johnson had done. Fuck J.J. It was his unoriginal crapfest of a first movie that doomed that trilogy right from that start, and he deserves every possible scrap of blame for everything that was less than perfect in ROS. Which was pretty much everything other than Ian McDiarmid's performance.

What about that little guy that fixed 3PO?

 

[The Human Q-Tip]

What about that little guy that fixed 3PO?

Fuck him too. If I even remembered who the hell he was.

I give J.J. 0/10 Mandalorians. I'd rather have had The Asylum make that last trilogy. At least it would have been worth a few chuckles.

 

[Sebastian]

Fuck him too. If I even remembered who the hell he was.

I give J.J. 0/10 Mandalorians. I'd rather have had The Asylum make that last trilogy. At least it would have been worth a few chuckles.

How about a new, new trilogy starring Robot Chicken Palpatine?

 

[Marcus]

Eh, I didn’t hate it. It was okay. I avoided all spoilers and went in without any real expectations.

In my mind, the only new movie that even comes close to standing up to the originals was Rogue One.

A final, merciful end to the entire Skywalker saga. Time to move on to other stories.

 

[Triplethreat]

Eh, I didn’t hate it. It was okay. I avoided all spoilers and went in without any real expectations.

In my mind, the only new movie that even comes close to standing up to the originals was Rogue One.

A final, merciful end to the entire Skywalker saga. Time to move on to other stories.

You know they’re going to keep this shit going but now it’s the “Palpatine story” since all the Skywalkers are technically dead.

 

[Obscured By Clouds]

Finally saw it. Fucking sucked. I'm amazed Kathleen Kennedy still has a job, because that is where the buck stops. There was no clear vision for a trilogy, they hired three directors to make their own movies, and when the third dropped out to not liking the 2nd's vision/story not working with his vision/story so they brought back JJ to attempt whatever this nonsense was.

Imagine if Kevin Feige had been in charge of this.

 

[Ohio]

Damn, I had managed to forget this entire trilogy for awhile, until now.

 

[Man Called X]

Star Trek > shitty space western/samurai flicks

 

[The Human Q-Tip]

Finally saw it. Fucking sucked. I'm amazed Kathleen Kennedy still has a job, because that is where the buck stops. There was no clear vision for a trilogy, they hired three directors to make their own movies, and when the third dropped out to not liking the 2nd's vision/story not working with his vision/story so they brought back JJ to attempt whatever this nonsense was.

Imagine if Kevin Feige had been in charge of this.

I watched Han Solo with my son a few days ago. We actually thought it was pretty good. Not great...but I didn't hate any of the characters (which is something I can't say about any of those movies since ESB), and I thought it told a decent Solo origin story. Also thought the lead actor did well enough given the impossibility of reprising Harrison Ford's creation.

 

[Wrathe]

I watched Han Solo with my son a few days ago. We actually thought it was pretty good. Not great...but I didn't hate any of the characters (which is something I can't say about any of those movies since ESB), and I thought it told a decent Solo origin story. Also thought the lead actor did well enough given the impossibility of reprising Harrison Ford's creation.

Agreed, not sure why Solo was panned (other than bitching is American's new thing to do). I thought it was pretty enjoyable.

As for Rise, yes the newest trilogy seemed disjointed when put together. The Palpatine out of nowhere thing was pretty contrived. Like literally, the first sign that he had anything to do w/ anything was when the text scrolled in the opening of Rise. Rey being able to pass life force around w/ no seeming effect to her but when Kylo does it, it kills him was another silly thing. Yet overall I still enjoyed the movie.

 

[Sebastian]

Agreed, not sure why Solo was panned (other than bitching is American's new thing to do). I thought it was pretty enjoyable.

As for Rise, yes the newest trilogy seemed disjointed when put together. The Palpatine out of nowhere thing was pretty contrived. Like literally, the first sign that he had anything to do w/ anything was when the text scrolled in the opening of Rise. Rey being able to pass life force around w/ no seeming effect to her but when Kylo does it, it kills him was another silly thing. Yet overall I still enjoyed the movie.

Obi-Wan is probably aware of the uncomfortable stare Qui-Gon is giving him after seeing Rey heal Ren.

 

[Jack Brickman]

Agreed, not sure why Solo was panned (other than bitching is American's new thing to do). I thought it was pretty enjoyable.

As for Rise, yes the newest trilogy seemed disjointed when put together. The Palpatine out of nowhere thing was pretty contrived. Like literally, the first sign that he had anything to do w/ anything was when the text scrolled in the opening of Rise. Rey being able to pass life force around w/ no seeming effect to her but when Kylo does it, it kills him was another silly thing. Yet overall I still enjoyed the movie.

I didn't really care for the guy they cast to play Solo. He was awful. Other than that, it was a pretty forgettable and inoffensive movie. I thought they butchered Han's character a bit by retconning him as this guy who was pretty much always a good guy, which went against his personality at the start of the original trilogy (basically the first thing we see him do is kill Greedo in cold blood) and also negates his character arc in that trilogy.

But compared to the garbage prequels and the shitty new movies, it wasn't that bad. I think the main issue is that Rogue One was so good and then Solo was more of a sad handjob of a film.